Falsely accusing your faithful spouse of having an affair can really throw your relationship for a loop. A loss of trust has occurred and on top of that it leaves you as the perpetrator in a real awkward position of not knowing what to do now since the potential damage has been done.
Is there a way to reverse or at least make up for what you have done? Time is the best remedy but during the early healing process of your relationship, the following are some suggestions on how to help your partner and your relationship get back to on track.
1) Apologize: Apologizing for your mistake is the best gesture to show that you are sincere and are serious about regaining the trust and positive upstate that your relationship had before.
2) Take Responsibility For Your Actions: Tell your spouse that you take responsibility for your accusation and that the reason why you accused them of having an affair was an unresolved issue that has to do with you, not them.
3) Promise Them That You Will Take Care of Your Own Issues: Say to your spouse you are going to investigate why you have trust issues and that you will take the initiative to heal yourself so you will not do that again to him or her. For example, when you were child, one of your parents had an affair and got caught and it had such a traumatic effect on you that you are now sensitive towards being hurt in the same way and are focused on preventing that from happening to you to a point where you jump the gun or overreact. Therefore it is in your own best interest to heal your trauma and in the best interest of your relationship to deal with the trauma as well.
4) Empathize With Your Partner: Empathize or learn empathy techniques so you can empathize with how you spouse is feeling so they feel validated and understood which will increase their ability to heal, forgive and regain your trust. Even say that you understand and it's OK if they are angry at you because you would feel the same way if it happened to you.
5) Give Your Partner Some Time to Heal and Regain Trust: Give you spouse some time and space. Trying to force forgiveness or trust or expecting them just to get over it doesn't hurry up the process; it'll actually slow the process down. Time is yours and your partner's best friend.
Due to the awkwardness of accusing your faithful spouse of having affair, it is almost instinctual to just want to laugh it off. However, if you step up and make a sincere effort to see the incident as an opportunity for your relationship to grow, before you know it, you and your spouse will be having the fun and laughs just the way you used to.